Monday, July 31, 2006

Why Children?

A newsletter
F R O M T H E V I S I O N F O R U M , I N C .

M A R C H 1 , 2 0 0 2

Why Children?

Each year the Russian population decreases by about one million. With a 0.8 child-per-family average, a higher rate of abortions than births, and a systemic birth-control and anti-child philosophy, the Russian people are not only facing the extinction of their family life, but the loss of their culture to other groups with an aggressive pro-child philosophy. Russians, like Germans and other European peoples, are finding that Muslims increasingly govern the economic infrastructure of their nation. Why? Because Muslims can fill the jobs, then send others to fill more jobs, and eventually dominate the marketplace. They average more than four children per family and their faith emphasizes the necessity of strong family culture built on loyalty and shared beliefs -- thus ensuring the birth of even more Muslims to further populate and influence the nation.

When it comes to viewing children as a blessing, most Muslims are closer to the biblical paradigm than the typical professing Christian evangelical. This is not a vindication of Islam, just an observation that Mohammedanism is aggressively populating the world using a borrowed Christian doctrine, and proving that even a broken clock is right twice a day. The fact that many of their beliefs are Satanically inspired and completely foreign to the biblical notion of the family is beyond the scope of this newsletter. The point is, their religion and influence is spreading exponentially, while nations that once claimed a Christian worldview are dieing in direct proportion to their philosophy of children.

Americans are not immune, and Christians tend to be the worst at concocting all sorts of reasons to reject children. Far too many have bought hook, line, and sinker into the contraceptive mentality. Even worse, they have rationalized twisted notions of personal freedom, "household order," and "self-fulfillment" as the basis for rejecting the second greatest gift after salvation which God gives to man and woman: a child.

The decision to prevent children because "they are too expensive" (as if God cannot provide for the living souls He places in your home); or that they are "too much of a burden" (as if the inconvenience of training children outweighs the blessing of nurturing souls which will live for all of eternity), is fundamentally a function of the selfishness of our age. I have actually heard Bible-believing parents make a "quality of life" argument that one should not have a child unless one can assure the ability to "send them to a good college."

Some have even argued that "it may be good stewardship of time and resources" not to have children. If this is true, please show me any clear pattern, precept, or principle in the Bible that links the notion of stewardship with the act of cutting off the godly seed (no out-of-context prooftexting, speculations, or bizarre analogies, please). Remarkably, those who make this last argument are usually typical Americans who, from a standard-of-living perspective, are fabulously wealthy compared to 99% of the people who ever lived. The fact is, God says to the rich and the poor: "children are a blessing" and "be fruitful and multiply." (A friend of mine has correctly observed that the Bible calls debt a curse and children a blessing, but in our culture we apply for curses and reject blessings. Something is wrong with this picture.)

Given the overwhelming admonitions and evidence found in Scripture that parents should trust God for children, the burden of proof for presenting a theological argument for not having children is squarely placed on the proponents of child-prevention -- not on those who see children as an inherent blessing.

In point of fact, the Bible knows nothing of the child-prevention philosophy. It teaches precisely the opposite. In Scripture, we are taught that having children (and lots of them -- "to be fruitful") is part of the prime directive for every parent. The book of Malachi even declares, "for this cause did I make the two one, that they would bring forth a Godly seed." The Bible explains that our children are our true riches, more precious than gold and silver; they are our inheritance, and a blessing from the Lord. The Bible is replete with examples of "poor" and "rich" men rewarded with many children, thus demonstrating that there is no correlation in the Scriptures between economic status and the blessing of children. Children help to define our God-ordained mission in life. God's commandment to families was that they were to be fruitful and multiply, and, with that as a foundation, would take godly dominion over the earth. Each of us are to pray for and prepare our children to know Jesus Christ, and to be faithful covenant-keepers, thus perpetuating the Church of Jesus Christ, and defeating the enemy with righteous population.


The view I have just articulated is not popular today. It is rarely preached from the pulpit. But once upon a time, it was an unquestioned assumption of orthodox Christianity, as is evidenced from Christian writings ranging from the Church Fathers to the Reformers. Each of us needs to be reminded of the rich pro-child philosophy from past centuries, which is why we must read the right books. This year, a number of the families of the Vision Forum have been reading Home-Making, a remarkable book written in the 19th century. With theological precision, but also passion and poetry of expression, the author communicates the joy and significance of children and parenthood. The book is my top recommendation from our catalog for this year. Following is an excerpt:

God has so constituted us that in loving and caring for our own children the richest and best things in our natures are drawn out. Many of the deepest and most valuable lessons ever learned are read from the pages of unfolding child-life. We best understand the feelings and affections of God toward us when we bend over our own child and see in our human parenthood a faint image of the divine Fatherhood. Then in the culture of character there is no influence more potent than that which touches us when our children are laid in our arms. Their helplessness appeals to every principle of nobleness in our hearts. Their innocence exerts over us a purifying power. The thought of our responsibility for them exalts every faculty of our souls. In the very care which they exact, they bring blessing to us. When old age comes, very lonely is the home which has neither son nor daughter to return with grateful ministries, to bring solace and comfort to the declining years!

It is a new marriage when the first-born enters the home. It draws the wedded lives together in a closeness they have never known before. It touches chords in their hearts that have lain silent until now. It calls out powers that have never been exercised before. Hitherto unsuspected beauties of character appear. The laughing heedless girl of a year ago is transformed into a thoughtful woman. The careless, unsettled youth leaps into manly strength and into fixedness of character when he looks into the face of his own child and takes it in his bosom. New aims rise up before the young parents, new impulses begin to stir in their hearts. Life takes on at once a new and deeper meaning. The glimpse they have had into its solemn mystery sobers them. The laying in their hands of a new and sacred burden, an immortal life, to be guided and trained by them, brings to them a sense of responsibility that makes them thoughtful. Self is no longer the centre. There is a new object to live for, an object great enough to fill all their life and engross their highest powers. It is only when the children come that life becomes real, that parents begin to learn to live. We talk about training our children, but they train us first, teaching us many a sacred lesson, stirring up in us many a slumbering gift and possibility, calling out many a hidden grace and disciplining our wayward powers into strong and harmonious character.

'Children are God's apostles, day by day
Sent forth to preach of love, of hope, of peace.'

Our homes would be very cold and dreary without the children. Sometimes we weary of their noise. They certainly bring us a great deal of care and solicitude. They cost us no end of toil. When they are very young they break our rest many a weary night with their colics and teethings, and when they grow older they well-nigh break our hearts many a time with their waywardness. After they come to us we may as well bid farewell to living for self and to personal ease and independence if we mean to do faithful duty as parents. There are some who therefore look upon the coming of children as a misfortune. They talk about them lightly as 'responsibilities.' They regard them as in the way of their pleasure. They see no blessing in them. But it is cold selfishness that looks upon children in this way. Instead of being hindrances to true and noble living, they are helps. They bring benedictions from heaven when they come, and while they stay they are perpetual benedictions.

'Ah! what would the world be to us
If the children were no more?
We should dread the desert behind us
Worse than the dark before.

'What the leaves are to the forest,
With light and air for food,
Ere their sweet and tender juices
Have been hardened into wood,--

'That to the world are children;
Through them it feels the glow
Of a brighter and sunnier climate
Than reaches the trunks below.'

When the children come what shall we do with them? What duties do we owe to them? How may we discharge our responsibility? What is the parents' part in making the home and the home-life? It is impossible to overstate the importance of these questions.

It is a great thing to take these young and tender lives, rich with so many possibilities of beauty, of joy, of power, all of which may be wrecked, and to become responsible for their shaping and training and for the upbuilding of their character. This is what must be thought of in the making of a home. It must be a home in which children will grow up for true and noble life, for God and for heaven. Upon the parents the chief response rests. They are the builders of the home. From them it receives its character, whether good or evil. It will be just what they make it. If it be happy, they must be the authors of the happiness; if it be unhappy, the blame must rest with them. Its tone, its atmosphere, its spirit, its influence, it will take from them. They have the making of the home in their own hands, and God holds them responsible for it.


Last two thoughts from me: First, for those that God has not blessed with children: be at peace. God has a plan for you as well -- perhaps even rescuing a child from abortion or abandonment through adoption. (My own bride was adopted and for this I am eternally grateful.) The point, however, is that all of us must have a child-loving, family-oriented vision -- this vision is not just for present parents, but also for the single, the barren, and the aged. God places the solitary in families. His plan for the elderly is not to be playing golf in Florida, but to speak into the lives of grandchildren. Each of us is to live in and around families, and to encourage families as foundational to the strength of the local church, the community, and society. Each of us has a role to play affirming the blessing of children to the body of Christ.

Second, if you are a parent, it is not enough to know that children are a blessing. You must passionately feel it. You must crave your children, rejoice in them, and long for their love as an all-consuming hope, second only to your love of Christ and your spouse. Every time you look at them, you must say to yourself "I am blessed. Thank you God." You must cry to Heaven: "Thank you God for this undeserved reward." The thought of these little ones must bless you as no earthly entertainment or comfort could ever bless you.

But this is not enough. Each of us must act must act upon this passion. It is not enough to be hearers, or even "feelers" of the Word. We must be doers. That means action, interaction, engagement, and involvement. And this for a lifetime with your progeny. After all, what shall it profit a man to gain the whole world, but to lose the souls of his children thanks to his own neglect and indifference.

"Dear Lord, bless us with a life-affirming, child-loving passion for our children, and for those children yet to be born."

Saturday, July 29, 2006

A busy Saturday!

So today will not be a day of rest and relaxation. I have got to get some things done around here. My to do list goes something like this:
Clean master bedroom....boys clean there room....clean the rest of upstairs
Clean and organize the library and ALL paperwork for school and business....put away ALL the clean laundry....Prepare new master schedule and chore chart....create an art folder for Jordan to keep all his master pieces in ;-))

Then on Sunday I will plan and get together all the school work for the next 4 weeks. That should take most of the day. So I am off the computer and on to work.
I think the picture below is cute so just wanted to share.

Miss Eve

Friday, July 28, 2006

My Lovely Children

"Summer of 2006"

Out of the mouths of babes

My older boys get tired of cereal ( I am that mean mom who only allows them to eat the healthy cereals) and some mornings I just don't feel like making a 4 course breakfast. This was one of those mornings. So the older two boys made themselves cinnamon toast. The younger ones I just made bowls of cereal for. Well my 5 year old wanted cinnamon toast to, but I told him that I didn't feel like making cinnamon toast this morning (I know bad mom)

He looks at me and says why did they get cinnamon toast? I said lovingly, "well they didn't listen to mommy" (I had told them to eat some cereal when they asked what was for breakfast) so he thinks about it for a second then says "I no listen to you to, mommy!"

What a cutie!

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Brother and Sister

These two are inseperable. Jordan from day one has taken great care of her. He gets her out of bed in the morning.

When she is taking a nap and it has been about 2 hours, Jordan will say "mom should I go check on Eve?"

She loves him just as much. She was sucking her thumb with her head laying on his shoulder right before I took these pictures. So adorable!

Arent kids the best!!!

Monday, July 24, 2006

I'm down here..............

...........can you hear me? Under the various piles of paperwork that need to be dealt with. Underneath all the clean clothes that need to be put away. No wait, I'm under this big huge to do list with a hundred things written on it, and another 50 that I keep forgetting to write on it.

Call this person....make this appointment...finish this bid on the computer....schedule the next few months....complete school work with all the children....keep the house clean....make healthy meals that ALL the kids will love (hahaha).

It seems that as my life around me keeps getting bigger, I remain only one person! Two...Three...Five...Seven children. Still one me!

One...Two...four...grades to teach. Still one me!

1100...1800...2400...3000...3600 sq ft to clean. Still one me!

I am realizing that as life gets bigger you have to become more of a micro manager...with super human organizational skills...and the determination to walk through a day with the job of six profesionals on your one, not so super human back!

Will I make it to the surface? That is still to be determined.

Friday, July 21, 2006

That one "special" child

My darling almost 7 year old, my 3rd son, Seth. Oh how I just cant seem to understand how you are wired. You were the absolute most perfect baby to ever grace this earth. You never really complained about anything, and you waited patiently in all things. Then one day something happened. Maybe the earth shifted just a smidge, but something was thrown terribly off.

From the time you hit 3 you became a different little boy. Always getting into things....over and over again. No spanking or punishment or talking to ever swerved your determination. If we are in a busy place you are the one that will wonder off. Perhaps we could just call you strong willed, determined, focused. But I don't think that paints the whole picture.

You anger your poor older brothers into oblivion. Of which it seems they can not return. They have known you to be this way for so long, always causing problems, not playing right, tearing up their games, that I'm not sure you will ever be able to redeem yourself. I am not really sure what to do to help you understand. I have explained to you what I feel you need to know in order to be an easier person to be around. Yes, it is true that at this point your brothers have built a resistance to you, perhaps they are just as much a part of the problem as you are.

I thought for sure with age it would get better (and it has a bit). You guys would have more in common. You would mature a bit and understand what is appreciated in a relationship. You are so kind in other ways, cuddly and loving. Its not all bad. Perhaps you are just that special child in the family, that no one ever really understood, who will go on to change the world.

I pray dear son that you will develop great discernment and wisdom in all things. That you will know without a dought the difference between wrong and right, and that you will always choose what is right. A personality like yours has to know these things. I pray that you direct all your ways to The Lord and use all that determination for good!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

The Lord hears our prayers

So, she is gone. She left this morning not saying where she was off to, but at least she is off to somewhere. I am sad in a way, not that she has gone, but that it just cant be different. I am pretty sure this is the end of our relationship. If I hear from her again I would be surprised.

My 5 year old said "granny is moving back to her house?" (he doesnt realize that some people dont have homes) I said "yes honey she has moved back" and he said "but she didnt say good buy to me" I could see it in his eyes that he was hurt. But that is how it goes I guess, with people who are only really interested in themselves. They just cant even imagine that they may be hurting someone else.

Thank you all so much for your prayers. The Lord was listening. It didnt seem that she would be in a position to leave for a few more weeks, yet she left today. So, He made a way. Just like He always does. I do hope....and feel confident that I did all that I could have done for her, although I'm sure she doesnt see it that way. All that matters really to me is what The Lord thinks. Again thank you all!

Have a BLESSED Day!

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Some added thoughts on yesterdays post

I wanted to say that I realize it seems I could be harboring horrible unforgiveness for my mother through my words. But I want to make it clear that I am not. I have forgiven her and do so on a daily basis, as she speaks hurtful things to me. I realize that she is what she is and doesn't even see the error of her ways.

My real struggle is that the peace and tranquility that I and all moms, who love their home and families create around them, is shattered at this time. There is no refuge for me right now. So I try and write it out as not to say anything harmful in return to her. Maybe grasping for that one ounce of truth to combat all her deception.

There is great power in forgiveness and we must all forgive one another. We do not however have to continue to be beat down and emotional drained by those who we really have no responsibility to. I have learned much through this time. My eyes have been opened and things revealed that make me a stronger person. I have such gratitude that The Lord has given me a sound mind and an understanding spirit. There really is no greater gift aside from salvation. It has been a spiritual battle. As she speaks to me and then the devil backs up her words in my mind. I then have to sift through it and put it all back under the truth. It can make you very weary. But as I said before, I am getting stronger and learning how to stand firm in My Lord and not lies. I am just ready to be through this so that I can be a mom and wife to my best ability without having to be on guard all the time. That time will come. That time will come!

Monday, July 17, 2006

What to Do??

Have you ever just been in an impossible situation, where you just know that if you have to bear another day of it you will surly die. That has been my life in my home for the past 2 months. Many know that my mother (whom I really dont know) called unexpectadly and said that she needed a place to stay. In hind sight I should have said "I am very sorry, but that is not possible" But me being the ever so forgiving and helpful person that I am (like a sucker) said sure I suppose you can.

I have tried, I really have. But the thing about her is she lives in a different reality than most. A place where the devil is always after her. She never wants to let anyone know her business because they might curse her. This is a self proclaimed christian woman. But I am having a hard time finding the fruit. I have searched I really have. I want so much to believe that she is not some disfunctional person.
She has come into my home and told me how I should be and act and made reference to the "lie" that I am not as close to The Lord as she is. Or perhaps that I am not christian at all. Yet I look at her and think are you serious? Here you stand before me with nothing and no one at the age of 56. You have nothing! Oh I'm sorry I forgot it has nothing to do with your decisions in was all the devils doing. I know the devil lady. I also know that if you are under the blood of Jesus, the devil cannot touch you without The Lords permission or you opening the door and letting him in.

I cant really take much more of this! She had been givin 2 weeks to get herself together and move out, yet she cant keep a job. I feel sorry for her, that she cant find peace in her life. But I feel like she has stolen mine. Her very presence makes my spirit cringe. I have tried and given all that I can give, but I am a grown woman and this is my home and I need it to be a safe place for me and my family. It is not safe right now.

Am I wrong for saying such harsh things about the woman who gave birth to me? I dont know. I guess the Lord will let me know on judgment day, if I am right or wrong. But is it worth my peace to allow her to stay. Should my life be thrown out of wack, because she cant handle hers? She has been asked to leave and yet feels like she doesnt have to, due to the job situations. I didnt say if all works out according to your plans, you can leave in 2 weeks. I said you need to be out in 2 weeks. Yet here she stays. I guess I need a place to go for a few weeks until she is gone.

Sunday, July 16, 2006


I must have dove head first back into the trenches this morning. I have had a miserable day. I seem to have this recurring migraine headache, that hit me so hard today (of course while Rob was gone). I seriously thought I wasn't going to make it through it. I could not open my eyes because the light was piercing. Not to mention the awful nausea that accompanies a migraine. I took 2 Excedrin Migraine and it has taken the edge off. I don't feel as though my head is about to implode. Although it is still pounding. I have locked myself away in the library on the couch (its the coolest room in the house). Eve has been so sweet. Its like she knows I don't feel well and she has just been playing quietly in here while I rest. The boys are in the rest of the house, behaving.

My friend Emily (she's on the MOMYS list) had her baby this morning. A little girl! YAY! Congratulations Em. I don't know any details except that none of the midwives made it in time, so it was a family affair.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Ahhh, the light at the end of the tunnel

Today has been a fabulous day in prego land. I have felt wonderful. I woke up feeling good (which usually is the case) so I thought, I will get busy early this morning and get some house work done before the yukkies set in. I made breakfast, started laundry, washed breakfast dishes, moped the floor. When I realized, hey I am still not sick! So then I cleaned the bathrooms, made lunch, washed the lunch dishes, cut out material for a maternity dress (cut one side wrong, have to go get 2 more yards of material, sigh) and in all I did 7 loads of laundry and FOLDED and PUT THEM AWAY!!

It has been wonderful to feel like my old self. I did have about 30 minutes at about 3:00 where I thought here it comes, but it shortly subsided. Now if I make it through the late evening with out the quizzes I am home free! I seem to feel at my worst in the evenings. I am expecting the best though.

I received my NF prenatal vitamins in the mail today. I have heard some good things about them and thought I would give them a try. They are horse pills though, and you have to take 6 a day. If I could give advice to any lady just starting out in the season of pregnancies and nursing it is this. Take extra GREAT care of your self. I have always been really healthy. Although I was young when I had my first couple of kiddos and the body bounces back really fast. I was a size 6 a few weeks after having my 3rd child. But let me say the older I get(a whopin 30 now LOL) the more I can see where I should have taken prenatals and eaten better, TAKEN CALCIUM. I am horrible about taking things. I will take vitamins for a few weeks then I just fall away from it. So I say this on record now being pregnant with number 7 and nursing and growing all these wonderful babies, I should have taken my vitamins in years past. Another thing I suggest is to strengthen your tummy muscles while not prego. It is so important to have a strong core. And don't forget those Keigals. You should try and do 200 a day.

So if you are a momy who prays to have many pumpkins in your child bearing season take your vitamins, rest when your pregnant and for at least a week after delivery (I never can seem to do that one), and keep those baby carrying areas of your body toned.

May all those lovely ladies who are pregnant, have blessed healthy pregnancies and deliveries and babies. For those of you praying and waiting (eat a twinky) you know who you are ( I love you ;-) I did read the other day that a woman who is under 6% body fat will have a very difficult time concieving. I'll send you a box of Hostess!

Friday, July 14, 2006

Seeing Green

And not the paper kind! Apparently there is a really rare green rash going around. Have you heard about it? Yah, me neither, but here is what it looks like. It apparently only strikes naked children in diapers. So keep your children fully dressed and you might be able to keep it at bay. It also effects children in two's. So perhaps if you kept them all separated it wont visit your house. But in all honesty if you have a bunch of toddlers running around your house it will more likely than not make a visit to your home as well. I here it can come in many colors, preferably not the black permanent kind!

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

In the trenches

Thank you so much ladies for asking how I am feeling. I am presuming I am almost to week 10. It is funny the only thing keeping track for me is the ticker at the top of my page. I will click on my blog every couple of days and go " oh look Im 9 weeks today"

I am still in the trenches. I had my worst week yet this past 7 or so days. With horrible migraines and nausea at its height. The first few months of pregnancy are hard times for me and it is the only thing I dread about having more blessings. I feel totally unavailable to my kiddos. Meals around here become sandwiches and fast food. I struggle to keep up with the house, laundry, showering (LOL) and my adventurous 3 and 1 year olds.

But I thank the Heavenly Father He has blessed me with such an understanding husband, who tolerates it for a few months until I come back to life. The upside is that I have only been this sick before with my daughter, so I am really thinking we might be seeing pink again!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Touching Words

I am a member of a group called MOMYS (mothers of many young siblings). Here over 2000 ladies ask questions, give advice, encourage one another and share in each others losses and additions. I have learned alot on this list and met some ladies that have changed my life. It is a christian group and often there are questions concerning relegion or church, or the like. Here lately there has been much discusion on what it is that The Father asks of His children. We know we are to follow His commands, it says it over 200 times in the Scriptures. Often many dont know what that is. What are His commands. Well we have been taught that the 10 commandments are important to follow and that is absolutely true. But what about all those weird commands in the OT. We really dont have to follow that nonsense do we. It makes no sense, it can be bothersome and not to mention inconvenient. Does it matter if we follow the OT laws? Are we saved by following them. Absolutely not! Does it please The Father when we do what He asks? I think so! A question was asked about wearing only dresses and the lady asking the question basically said why should I "have to" when I dont feel like its for me. Below is a reply from a very wise woman Tina, she owns the is what she says, and you can not put it in any plainer words than this

<<["Have to"? What do I "have to" do to be their mother? What do I "have
to" do to be his wife? What do I "have to" do to be her daughter? Think of the
many of us here who have lost children or parents or even husbands.
Is the attitude, "oh, good, I no longer "have to" serve them?

If you believe you "have to" - then that is legalism. You don't "do" things to
earn anything; not God's favor, not salvation, not glory or honor. These things we do as an outflowing of the love in our hearts to please and bless and
serve a God who has given us some indications of those things that please Him. Like baking your husband's favorite desert for his birthday. Do you "have to" or "get to"?

Praise God, I get to clean Skip's hair out of the sink and once in a while pick up his socks. Do I "have to"? Only if I want the blessings that result - a clean sink and a clean spot on the floor, and him knowing (maybe) that I am doing
some little thing as an act of love for him. It's an opportunity to say, "Thank You, God, that this man is in my life and I am in his home, and he is here to serve!" What if he was so distant from me that I didn't know which foods he
prefers? What words he likes to hear? Which is his favorite chair? How blessed and loved I feel when he brings me my favoirte flowers, or fixes me my favorite latte!

If Skip asks for oatmeal-raisin-nuts&cinnamon cookies on father's day, shall I bake oatmeal only because it is too much trouble to go the extra mile and add the nuts and cinnamon? Do I leave out the raisins because I don't like them? Who am I baking these for? Why? Do I "have to"?

If God says, "do this....." do we try to convince Him that something else means the same? Or do we try to figure out what it means to Him, and do that the best we can?

Maybe you think more about these things as you get older. What if we didn't know God? What if He hadn't sent His Spirit and His Son? What if He hadn't
allowed others to be grafted in to His family as adopted sons and daughters?


Monday, July 03, 2006

Six Flags Pictures

Here are the pictures I promised of Six Flags. Look for the boys in light blue shirts. Devon is so scared of heights that he has his head bent down on most of the high flying rides. And Elijah was cute, as we were waiting to ride the tea cups he said "I want to ride the coffee" I love the toddler mind!
Oh that there were such an heart in them, that they would fear me, and keep all my commandments always, that it might be well with them, and with their children for ever! Duet 5:29